BLOGGER



Youngest kid of six with an inferiority and black sheep complex, but determined that God saves not just his soul to heaven but the remainder of his manic-depressive life, so others won't say he became a Christian and remained a jerk.


MAIN THEMES

On identity
i won't be transparent before i'm opaque. and you'll get to know me starting from the small things: who my favourite bands are. what kind of movies i like. who are my heroes.

On Christianity
I’m convinced that when confronted with sincere, real love, the Jesus factor will become obvious. But let’s not plant the cross before we carry it. I’m not trying to con you.

On dreams
Some dreams are meant to be achieved. I know that. But maybe other dreams are meant to drive us, privately. Never known to anyone but ourselves.


OTHER THEMES

On melancholy
It is a sadness that, when choosing between crying and sighing, will choose sighing. I'd almost say that melancholy is being sad about sadness itself.

On memory and nostalgia
It saddens me when life moves forward and people decide that certain things are worth forgetting.

On language
I've learnt that the word irregardless is filed as a non-standard word in the English language. That's a lexicographer's way of saying it's not a real word.

On politics
Crowds are fickle things. So when we stand in the thousands and cry against the present government, do we know who we're actually crying for?

On society
People always want the best for themselves. But I want to sometimes take second or third or fourth best, just so that the loser down the road doesn't always have to come in last. It must feel like shit to always come in last.

On growing old
Leasehold property make me feel sad. It doesn't matter how old the family photos are that you put on your wall. It's your family but it's not really your wall.

On philosophy
I ask you, if God loves everyone, and if God is also incapable of loving evil, how can there be such a thing as an evil man?

On a daily basis
One line quips, like this.


CHAT





Thursday, June 11, 2009
Free Image Hosting
The context: we're heading straight from work for a shoot with fai's company, beanworks.

Athalia: what do you want to have for dinner?

Fergus: hmmmmmmmm
to be very honest
not much
what would you like?

Athalia: bubba gumps
with a milkshake from mcd's

Fergus: :O

Athalia: and maybe some green tea ice-cream
can?

Fergus: can
put it on beanworks
:D
heheheh

Athalia: dowan
I prefer to put it on a table
easier to eat

Fergus: qahahahahaha!@!!1!

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Genusfrog [ 3:08 pm ] | 0 comments

Thursday, March 12, 2009



Fergus: shyte
i just discovered stg
about itunes

Chrischew: ooo what

Fergus: you can add tags to songs
it's called Grouping

Chrischew: eh meaning?

Fergus: you can add words in the attributes, separated by commas
then if you do searches, theyw ill search for those keywords too
for example
i can tag all my smiths songs with keywords "morrissey" and "marr"

Chrischew: ooooooo

Fergus: so if i run a search for morrissey, i get his solo stuff and smiths
if i tag my modest mouse with "marr" as well
a "marr" search will throw up both bands

Chrischew: ooooo

Fergus: think about it
you can tag "yap" on all of furniture, ferns, this body broken and azmyl yunor tracks

Chrischew: ahahahhah

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Genusfrog [ 1:32 pm ] | 0 comments

Thursday, February 26, 2009



Fergus walks up to roger's desk and thumps his fist in the air.

Roger: congrats

Fergus: i distinctly remember someone saying it was gonna be 6-1

Roger: yeah, actually i wrote 6-1 but my 6 looped too high, it ended up looking like a 0
messed with the stars

Fergus: ahhh. well, thanks, thanks. i'll have you know that i also wrote 10-0 for man united
but my 1 didn't really come out

Roger: right. there's always the return leg

I love my liverpool like this. up against the best in the world, tagged as the perrenial underachievers and written off by most as an underdog. that's when my liverpool stands up. i love the character they show when nobody believes that they can do it. give liverpool the toughest opposition and talk about it like a walk-over. that's how we wake up.

all my liverpool fandom, i've never known the giddying heights of topping the table and bossing the league. all i've ever known has been romantic cup runs. i fell in love with liverpool over their 1995 fa cup run and my first real taste of victory came in 2001 when we won three cups in three months. in 2005 we had that unbelievable european cup run that resulted in instanbul (and what is now the notorious account of me weeping on my knees) and since then, it's still been cups, cups, cups.

i don't know if i'm just escaping the sorrow of league mediocrity again, but it's a very comforting escape. it's comforting to know that while man u and chelsea have traded league titles in the last five years, there is one thing liverpool do better than anyone else in the world - come up against the giants in cup competitions and send them home.

all this will be moot if we don't get a result next week at anfield. but i'm thinking not. onwards to the quarter finals.

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Genusfrog [ 9:18 am ] | 0 comments

Wednesday, February 18, 2009




Athalia: anything on tomorrow?
Fergus: nopes. i make it a point to be unexpectedly tied up on alternate days.
Athalia: -_-

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Genusfrog [ 5:26 pm ] | 1 comments

Thursday, January 22, 2009



1.30pm
(hmmm where's my access card? oh, where's my wallet? must be in the car)

2.54pm
Let's go downstairs for a drink. vending machine.

2.56pm
I don't have my access card. it's in the car.

3.01pm
Eh. it's not here lah. it must've dropped out in dengkil.

(on the drive to dengkil)

3.06pm
Lady: Hello. fergus ong? i'm from geena hair salon ah. just now one man chandra called. he said you lost your wallet. you go and get from him now?

3.08pm
Fergus: Hello, mr chandra? oh mr chandran? yes, i think i left my wallet just now. ya. i'm on my way now. thanks!

3.10pm

(chandran 1 wags his finger at me as i walk towards him. he's on a table with another man.)

Chandran 1: Fergus ong

Fergus: Hi mr chandran. thanks so much.

Chandran 2: So you are Fergus ong ah.

Fergus, turning to the other man: Yes.

Chandran 2, pulling out my wallet: You check your money, see if it's all there. i went through some of your contacts, then i found this... rina or gina or dunno what. actually i called another contact, this diana. but she say she don't know you.

Chandran 1: Nasib baik tau. tadi orang sapu lantai kat sana, dompet lu kat sini! saya pun kelam kabut wo!

Chandran 2: We thought maybe we keep for one day then if nobody come then give to balai.

Chandran 1: Ic semua ada kat dalam wo!

Chandran 2: Better you check all your money all there la.

Fergus, to chandran 2: Thanks so much. What's your name?

Chandran 2: Chandran.

Fergus, to chandran 1: Oh. so how about you?

Chandran 1: I oso chandran.

We laugh a bit, shake hands and i give chandran 1, who is the gerai owner, a reward. of course, all this essentially means only one thing - no more hakka mee when i eat on that side.

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Genusfrog [ 3:59 pm ] | 4 comments

Tuesday, December 23, 2008
ON SEMBLANCE

Fergus (to Lily and her sister): the both of you don't look alike at all.
Lily: well, you and ernest and audrey also don't look alike.
Fergus: no. i look just like audrey. especially when shes pregnant.

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Genusfrog [ 7:16 pm ] | 0 comments

Friday, December 12, 2008
SLEEPING DOG

I recently had a tech problem at work that originated from a system crash. after ding donging with the tech support person, the problem got remedied, and i asked - not without sarcasm - if the initial problem would ever be investigated now that the immediate concern is relieved. here's what transpired, via email.

Tech support: we need to create the incident to investigate it.  If you are able to re-create the incident please list out the steps so that we can investigate.

Me: ...as for recreating the incident for us to investigate, I’ll have to check out the object and then reproduce a system crash. Might not be kosher, so I’ll let this sleeping dog lie.


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Genusfrog [ 11:25 am ] | 0 comments

Friday, November 28, 2008
6-MONTH

adlinr: hey man

is it:
6 month complimentary subscription
or
6 months complimentary subscription
or
6-month complimentary subscription
?

you can send me invoice later
i'm having a brainfart

Fergus: either

6-month complimentary subscription
or
6 months' complimentary subscription
or
6 months of complementary subscription
or
12 months of complementary subscription if you've helped Adlin with sub-editing

adlinr: hahha.. thanks!

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Genusfrog [ 4:52 pm ] | 0 comments

Monday, November 17, 2008
HOW I ENDED UP WITH A LOT OF 2008 EPs

Fergus: i think end of year i wanna do a list of top 10 EPs

Chrischew: hahah ok
got that many ah

Fergus: dunno. gotta look
i download a fair few randomly for the b-sides
on some teruk days
anything with a 7" on sordo that isn't doom sludge metal, i take

Chrischew: ahahahahahaha

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Genusfrog [ 3:48 pm ] | 0 comments

Friday, October 31, 2008
PICKUP

Kim: btw what do u call a guitar that already has the pickup inside it?

Fergus: a pickup guitar
like a pickup truck
only guitar

Kim: got it


Oh dear lord.

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Genusfrog [ 3:57 pm ] | 0 comments

Friday, October 24, 2008
GOODBYE PIPETTES

Fergus: do you know about pipettes' new lineup?
two of them quit earlier this year
i only just found out

theyap: hah
ahahaha
i dunno

Fergus: it gets more depressing
thety've been joined by two new members
the remnant girl - the blonde foxy one - said that the "new band" will have more 80s influences, with "more of a dance element"
:(
sak
it's over
cool kitsch 50s girlgroup revivalists - over
what's worse - the cute brunette, the one i liked - is gone
sak
this is a cruel world, i tell you
it looks out for the things in life that make you happy and it rips it up

theyap: ahahahahahahahah

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Genusfrog [ 10:51 am ] | 0 comments

Wednesday, June 18, 2008
ITALY AND WILLIAMS

To understand the following conversation, it helps if you know three things: (1) the food at williams, (2) italian football and its players, and (3) how committed we can be to being stupid sometimes.

the context is that this morning, my gtalk signature read "Forza Del Piero! Forza Grosso! Forza Italia!"

theyap: what lah. forza del piero somemore ah
del piero eating carbonara yesterday lah

Fergus: nolah
he eat marinara

theyap: i tot butter prawn penne?

Fergus: no... he ate the beef medallion
special

theyap: eh?
not nasi goreng ketam?

Fergus: no, no... allessandro is allergic to ketam

theyap: oh
then nasi goreng salami lah

Fergus: that one quagliarella ordered. he said not nice.

theyap: oh is it?
I heard pirlo ordered the chicken kiev
said too hard

Fergus: that pirlo hard to please wan lah.
donadoni had the bihun goreng special
cannot finish

theyap: yeah
got some scallops stuck to his beard
but grosso ate the indo mee goreng. the fella lau sai

fergusong: ohhh no wonder la look like that last nite

theyap: yeah
lau sai until his hair also messy

fergusong: ohhh i see
no wonder daniele de rossi kept telling me indo indo dunno what the fella saying
he had the seabass rissotto
he said it was "inspiring"

theyap: yeah
and toni drank the drain water, that's why couldn't score

fergusong: stupid idiot. i told him "ribena longan. but don't order from that uncle"
he must have gotten the limau version of ribena longan

theyap: i ran out items on the menu already

fergusong: eh that means you left early
you didn't see materazzi order the smoke duck pasta
fella ate two servings
sommore he called the duck's sister "a whore"
kena marah from ambrosini
who didn't like the food, so he went to murni's and ate loh shee fun

theyap: eh
i thought williams head butted materazzi

fergusong: oh is it?
i followed ambrosini to murni
must've missed it
but i got to chat with massimo. heart to heart. quite good sharing
he said he's been trying very hard to eclipse guardiola as the world's most boring midfielder and he needed prayer
i encouraged him lor
at least he liked the loh shee fun

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Genusfrog [ 11:05 am ] | 0 comments

Thursday, June 05, 2008
ON PELLE CARLBERG, BRAZILIAN FOOTBALLERS, STREET FIGHER 2 AND OTHER NONSENSE

I swear, the quality of our conversations is really going down the toilet.

theyap: have I ever given u pelle?
carlberg that is

Fergus: you gave me pele
but thot garincha was better

theyap: eh
i thought careca?
younger

Fergus: nolah
that one was marcio santos

theyap: ohhhhh yeah he looks better than Branca

Fergus: branco lah
watlah
branca
ryu lah
zangief

theyap: eh u dunno branca ah?
blanca's british brother

Fergus: ohh play in luton town reserves wan, yeah
i remember him
used to love those div 3 reserve games

theyap: yeah

Fergus: so much raw talent

theyap: he liked to curl up like a ball also
performance art fella

Fergus: ahahahah
(ok forces self to stop descending)

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Genusfrog [ 3:57 pm ] | 0 comments

Wednesday, June 04, 2008
ERNESTS GULBIS

Fergus: dude
there's a latvian guy at the french open
his name is Ernests Gulbis
as in... plural of Ernest

Ernest: oh yea i heard of him i think
yea man,
so many ernests

Fergus: yeah man. he's like at least twice the man you are
hahaahahah

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Genusfrog [ 2:13 pm ] | 0 comments

Friday, May 23, 2008
RAZVAN RAT

theyap: man
romania has a defender called Rat
against holland, italy and france
dunno how a Rat is gonna stop them

Fergus: AHAHAH
he's gonna... do a lot of running
i wonder if romania can squeak out a result in that group
:P
see if they can gnaw their way into the second round

theyap: muahahahahahahahahah
unless the oponents are cheesy, in which case he might eat them for breakfast

Fergus: hahaahahah
it's gonna be raining cats and dogs between italy, france and holland
they must find romania to be... such a pest

theyap: well, unless of course if he happens to be an attacking fullback, then he can attack them like a plague

Fergus: shit, i'm all out on bad puns

theyap: ahahahaha
me too

Fergus: i bet he can trap the ball well

theyap: hmm and if he can, Romania might be able to tail the others enough to get through

Fergus: yeah, if not they'll just have to take the mickey

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Genusfrog [ 2:21 pm ] | 0 comments

Thursday, May 08, 2008
ON BUST

Fergus: makan?

chris: armmm
8 mins?
:)

Fergus: cool
9 and you're bust

chris: goddit

Fergus: 10 and you're boobs

(about five mins later)

chris: u distracted me!
i need another...
3.5 mins!

Fergus: gosh i hate to think what that makes you

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Genusfrog [ 10:45 am ] | 0 comments

Tuesday, April 22, 2008
ON CRANKSHAFT AND CRANKY JARGON

Wikipedia, as i'm learning, can be a real pain with jargon. of course, with wiki, it's not wiki who's the pain, but the geeks who submit entries. still, nonetheless, a pain.

Athalia: the crankshaft is the long thing that turns the wheels

Fergus: ahhh thanks. cos that's a really helpful translation of "reciprocating linear piston motion into rotation"

on a related side note, this girl really knows her engines.

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Genusfrog [ 11:42 am ] | 0 comments

Wednesday, March 26, 2008
JAPAN HAVE

Ernest: dude, i'm going to ask u a very stupid english question
"in Japan there have been no reported court decisions"
it shd be "has" right?

Fergus: ehehehehe. nolah dude. have
cos japan got lots of islands so it's counted as plural

Ernest: dude

Fergus: like philippines also have
cos it ends with s
Philippine has
Philippines have

Ernest: dude, i cant think str8 right now
it's really has right?

Fergus: yalah
:P

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Genusfrog [ 2:25 pm ] | 1 comments

Tuesday, October 23, 2007
FAIL

kim: btw, how's it going? life good? have u failed ALL the challenges set up b4 u or conquered them all??

fergus: i failed. i failure. i fail.

I'm not actually such a miserable bastard. sure, i'm defeatist most of the time and whenever i'm not, i'm defeated. still, there's a very secretive side of me that believes my future will be a good one. it's the same side that dreams of living in a trailer house, make homemade toys for my kids, not have tv, and marry a girl who doesn't want a diamond ring, not because i can't afford one but because she agrees with me that her love can never be purchased by jewelry.

i sincerely believe that my future is far from dystopic.

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Genusfrog [ 4:13 pm ] | 2 comments

THE WESTIN HOTEL PHONECALL

I got a call from this telemarketer from westin hotel. some girl wanted me to become a member so i could fine dine and live in their rooms on the cheap. we got a running gag where i sit in the office. that the next time a telemarketer calls me, i'll pull a fast one on them. so when the call from this girl from westin came in, there were knowing smiles around me.

lady: hi, is this mister fergus?
fergus: yes
lady: i'm miss blablabla calling from westin hotel. do you know westin hotel in bukit bintang?
fergus: is that the one next to the whale aquarium?
lady: ha? aquarium?
fergus: ya, the one that has whales. near sungei wang.
lady: errr... no mister fergus. it's at blablablabla....
fergus: oh ok
lady: can i ask, are you local?
fergus: yes, i'm local
lady: oh, ok. anyway, mister fergus, do you want me to tell you about the details of our packages?
fergus: errr... nola, i'm not interested. i don't go to hotels wan
lady: mister fergus, we actually have a package where you can blablabla 50% discount on the room blablabla
fergus: it's ok. i don't need to stay in hotel. i got a house here oredi
lady: oh but mister fergus you go on holidays right? with this package you can go to any westin blablabla
fergus: nola, i don't travel wan.
lady: then your friends? i'm sure you have a lot of friends, maybe they get married and go for honeymoon
fergus: my friends honeymoon all go to melaka wan
lady: aiyo mister fergus, you can ask them to upgrade mah
fergus: hahaha
lady: then ah, but you can also go to the restaurant you know mister fergus. you can have blablabla discount
fergus: nola, i eat mamak food wan. and tai chow
lady: aiyoh, mister fergus i'm sure you can upgrade oso right?
fergus: cannot la, i every month make 500 dollars only
lady: no need to worry, it's not 500 dollars every month. if you join this package you pay an annual blablabla
fergus: no, every month, my salaray only 500 dollars, how to eat in hotel?
lady: ohhh... then do you have any friends who will like to become a member?
fergus: don't have la, all my friends poor wan
lady: mister fergus i'm sure you have, just a name and number maybe?

I stand up and walk to my collague's desk to see his phone number.

fergus: got one, wait... i give you his number
lady: ok, ok, you give me his number
fergus: it's 831240**
lady: is it 03?
fergus: yes, it's 03
lady: can i have his name?
fergus: ya. he is mister ravi
lady: thank you ya mister fergus
lady: you don't have his handphone number isit?
fergus: don't have la
lady: i see. okla. thanks anyway mister fergus
fergus: no worries. bye
lady: bye

-click-

my colleagues break into applause. what a laugh.

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Genusfrog [ 2:52 pm ] | 0 comments