GCB

BLOGGER

Youngest kid of six with an inferiority and black sheep complex, but determined that God saves not just his soul to heaven but the remainder of his manic-depressive life, so others won't say he became a Christian and remained a jerk.

MAIN THEMES

On identity
i won't be transparent before i'm opaque. and you'll get to know me starting from the small things: who my favourite bands are. what kind of movies i like. who are my heroes.

On Christianity
I’m convinced that when confronted with sincere, real love, the Jesus factor will become obvious. But let’s not plant the cross before we carry it. I’m not trying to con you.

On dreams
Some dreams are meant to be achieved. I know that. But maybe other dreams are meant to drive us, privately. Never known to anyone but ourselves.

OTHER THEMES

On melancholy
It is a sadness that, when choosing between crying and sighing, will choose sighing. I'd almost say that melancholy is being sad about sadness itself.

On memory and nostalgia
It saddens me when life moves forward and people decide that certain things are worth forgetting.

On language
I've learnt that the word irregardless is filed as a non-standard word in the English language. That's a lexicographer's way of saying it's not a real word.

On politics
Crowds are fickle things. So when we stand in the thousands and cry against the present government, do we know who we're actually crying for?

On society
People always want the best for themselves. But I want to sometimes take second or third or fourth best, just so that the loser down the road doesn't always have to come in last. It must feel like shit to always come in last.

On growing old
Leasehold property make me feel sad. It doesn't matter how old the family photos are that you put on your wall. It's your family but it's not really your wall.

On philosophy
I ask you, if God loves everyone, and if God is also incapable of loving evil, how can there be such a thing as an evil man?

On a daily basis
One line quips, like this.

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Tuesday, October 23, 2007

THE WESTIN HOTEL PHONECALL

I got a call from this telemarketer from westin hotel. some girl wanted me to become a member so i could fine dine and live in their rooms on the cheap. we got a running gag where i sit in the office. that the next time a telemarketer calls me, i'll pull a fast one on them. so when the call from this girl from westin came in, there were knowing smiles around me.

lady: hi, is this mister fergus?
fergus: yes
lady: i'm miss blablabla calling from westin hotel. do you know westin hotel in bukit bintang?
fergus: is that the one next to the whale aquarium?

lady: ha? aquarium?
fergus: ya, the one that has whales. near sungei wang.

lady: errr... no mister fergus. it's at blablablabla....
fergus: oh ok
lady: can i ask, are you local?
fergus: yes, i'm local
lady: oh, ok. anyway, mister fergus, do you want me to tell you about the details of our packages?

fergus: errr... nola, i'm not interested. i don't go to hotels wan

lady: mister fergus, we actually have a package where you can blablabla 50% discount on the room blablabla
fergus: it's ok. i don't need to stay in hotel. i got a house here oredi

lady: oh but mister fergus you go on holidays right? with this package you can go to any westin blablabla

fergus: nola, i don't travel wan.

lady: then your friends? i'm sure you have a lot of friends, maybe they get married and go for honeymoon

fergus: my friends honeymoon all go to melaka wan

lady: aiyo mister fergus, you can ask them to upgrade mah

fergus: hahaha

lady: then ah, but you can also go to the restaurant you know mister fergus. you can have blablabla discount

fergus: nola, i eat mamak food wan. and tai chow

lady: aiyoh, mister fergus i'm sure you can upgrade oso right?

fergus: cannot la, i every month make 500 dollars only
lady: no need to worry, it's not 500 dollars every month. if you join this package you pay an annual blablabla

fergus: no, every month, my salaray only 500 dollars, how to eat in hotel?

lady: ohhh... then do you have any friends who will like to become a member?
fergus: don't have la, all my friends poor wan

lady: mister fergus i'm sure you have, just a name and number maybe?

I stand up and walk to my collague's desk to see his phone number.

fergus: got one, wait... i give you his number

lady: ok, ok, you give me his number

fergus: it's 831240**

lady: is it 03?

fergus: yes, it's 03

lady: can i have his name?

fergus: ya. he is mister ravi

lady: thank you ya mister fergus

lady: you don't have his handphone number isit?

fergus: don't have la
lady: i see. okla. thanks anyway mister fergus
fergus: no worries. bye
lady: bye

-click-

my colleagues break into applause. what a laugh.

Labels: dialogue, happenings, humour

Genusfrog [ 2:52 pm ]

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