Youngest kid of six with an inferiority and black sheep complex, but determined that God saves not just his soul to heaven but the remainder of his manic-depressive life, so others won't say he became a Christian and remained a jerk.
i won't be transparent before i'm opaque. and you'll get to know me starting from the small things: who my favourite bands are. what kind of movies i like. who are my heroes.
I’m convinced that when confronted with sincere, real love, the Jesus factor will become obvious. But let’s not plant the cross before we carry it. I’m not trying to con you.
Some dreams are meant to be achieved. I know that. But maybe other dreams are meant to drive us, privately. Never known to anyone but ourselves.
It is a sadness that, when choosing between crying and sighing, will choose sighing. I'd almost say that melancholy is being sad about sadness itself.
On memory and nostalgia
It saddens me when life moves forward and people decide that certain things are worth forgetting.
I've learnt that the word irregardless is filed as a non-standard word in the English language. That's a lexicographer's way of saying it's not a real word.
Crowds are fickle things. So when we stand in the thousands and cry against the present government, do we know who we're actually crying for?
People always want the best for themselves. But I want to sometimes take second or third or fourth best, just so that the loser down the road doesn't always have to come in last. It must feel like shit to always come in last.
On growing old
Leasehold property make me feel sad. It doesn't matter how old the family photos are that you put on your wall. It's your family but it's not really your wall.
I ask you, if God loves everyone, and if God is also incapable of loving evil, how can there be such a thing as an evil man?
On a daily basis
One line quips, like this.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
i've been flitting between extreme burning passion for a cause or a job and complete indifference towards the whole world. some days, i feel so fired up, like i can take on everything and scold everyone whom i think is doing things wrongly and have an opinion and be all gung ho about life and living. then on other days, i couldn't be bothered to change lanes even if i'm stuck in a queue and the lane next to me is empty. i can't explain why i can be so motivated and driven to achieve things and get life going on one hand and on the flip side just switch and become uninterested in things and get all ecclesiastical about life.
havel. havelim. hakol. havel.
i don't wanna be down about it. i wanna be ON. i wanna be white hot with desire for God and life and purpose. now it seems like every three days of ripping fire is followed up by three days of bland, tasteless indifference.
what am i supposed to do?
Labels: defeat, survival
12:43 pm ]